Thursday, 15 November 2007

Death by PowerPoint

Have you ever sat through an intensely boring lecture, where the lights are off and the manager decides to give the team a thorough briefing of changes being made in the office? 50 slides of management speak along with stats, and how the team should be performing under those immense changes and what's expected of you? The lights are off and you're forced to spend a whole day listening to your manager speak for a minimum of 7 hours as you try desperately to stay awake. Failing that, you pray that if your eyes do close, then they won't hear you snoring.

Well, the time has come when I will have to be that manager and talk for not just 7 hours. Oh no my blogging friends, our Powers that be are insisting that I bore my new team for a whole 14 hours! Won't that be fun?

Yours truly has finally become a senior manager after passing my promotion board! Woohoo! And with great power comes with great responsibilities... or so i'm told. Now i'm all for bonding with my new team, but let's just say my ways might be a little bit more different to theirs. After being told what is expected of me and my team, it has to be said that i'm always up for new challenges and have no doubt that it'll be a bumpy ride as we all get to know each other along the way. But team bonding through death by PowerPoint? Not exactly a great way to get to know my team. it has to be said that they wouldn't be the only ones struggling to stay awake! "How about bowling, or going to the pub then?" I suggested? Their short and sweet reply? "NO!"

Okay, maybe too much too soon? I mean they're not used to my way of working yet, so better take it slow and steady then. "How about bonding via paintball? That way, instead of killing them with death by PowerPoint, I can get them with my lazer gun, or paint balls?" Given the look I received, I don't think they thought too highly of my suggestions. In all fairness though, I can't take the credit for the pub suggestion, that lil gem goes to my partner in crime. ;o) I think they're seriously thinking of changing their minds. Personally I think the team would like nothing better than to take pot shots of their managers. But that's just me!!

So with my last day tomorrow, I'm feeling slightly off. I've been with my team for 8 years and there's been lots of laughs (mainly from them laughing at my attempts to manage them) and tears (usually mine as I tear my hair out from their juvenile behaviour). ;o) And now it's all coming to an end. *sniff* So in true leaving style the team decided that we would need some executive toys for our new job, just to help us get into that mindset. Those toys consisted of a 'shocking' arm wrestling kit, (for when the staff become unruly and instead of hitting each other they get to wrestle). A wise talking Yoda (that answers all the important executive questions, such as who will make me coffee today). Separately my partner got a remote control armchair complete with booze for when the pressure gets too much and he needs to relax. And yours truly got a leather whip, for whipping the new team into shape. ;o) You've got to admire their ingenuity and cheek. ;o) Well at least now when my new team are being opinionated and unruly, I can say with confidence, "Don't make me get the whip out!" It will no longer be an idle threat. ;o)

I can't wait!! My new team have no idea about my humour, so this should be quite interesting.

1 comment:

Pocus said...

I want to come to work on your team!!!